Friday, October 26, 2012

Death ... mortality ... life goes on

Death has a funny way of creeping up on you personally, I mean its out it happens every day every hour but it doesn't really hit till someone close to you or someone you know is taken away. Epicurus was an ancient Greek philosopher said - Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.

As you read that number and to the end of this line, about another 10 have died
That’s about 1.8 people per second! 
= 108 People per minute
= 6,461 People per hour
= 155,060 People per day
= 56,597,034 per year

This week it visited 2 people who are related to me, both which I had more then just a cordial relationship with and would meet, visit and bump into each other as I grew up. Despite being elderly there was always that jovial nature that they shared with the younger me  with as much banter and closeness would allow.  When within 4 days when these two people passed on, I was shaken.

Initially it was the sadness I could not attend the funeral, the last goodbye but as the layers slipped away it, I found there were so many indirect factors, frustration of not achieving a target in hockey, letting something slipped away further compounded the situation when news of the death reached it the end I realized it was more about mortality.  There is some truth to the old saying, “There are only two things you can count on in life: death and taxes.” Everyone experiences death. Death and dying are an inevitable part of human life. but when it happen to someone close to you, you begin to question your self.

To be frank, I am not afraid, I try to give it all I can in my life for me and people around me. I try to leave an impact today then worrying about it tomorrow, sometimes dont see it that way, I dont blame them. I have learned growing up of giving 101% leaving it all on the table.

...Be it with friends, hockey, music, socializing, football and anything I put my heart and soul into, I have learn to give it all, for there may not be an opportunity tomorrow. These deaths has not changed my outlook in life, I dont feel the need to push the panic button,  but it reinforces what I believe and I want to continue to do what I am doing now without fear or favor. It dont matter if the people around me understand me or dont share my passion,  for in the end when I lay down... here lies Darthvadai Singam

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

I am perplexed

I am prepelxed, at times confused and at others a little irritated by this thing we call comminucation between friends

Eg 1 when someone does not sms or call you in a while and you reach by phone or sms and say hmmm "Hey how you doing not heward from you in a while bla bla bla ..." and you get a reply.. "Well I wanted to see how long before you would get in touch with me" and I am like WTF???
 Comment : you seriously got issues!!

Eg 2 a pal facing a prob so you ask if everything is ok and you get a reply yeah I am ok... aparently that is a lingo to say " no no no I am facing the mother of all problems and I am waiting for you to ask me properly, or ask me a few times before I can tell you about it" and I am like WTF???

 Comment : you seriously got issues!!

Friday, April 06, 2012

A spark born 11 years ago

It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller

Life sometimes can be like a chinese serial or a tamil drama especially when you have a young kid that elders say was as notty as you were as a kid. Being with a kid it has its fair share of twists and turns for fathers. Growing up with Junior Vadai, we have lived thru political & economical turmoils family splits and wars, 9/11 and much move but life does go on, each day each month each year is a new page to write on. Sometimes you visit the same pages again. having a son can be one of the greatest joys they will ever experience but also one of the greatest challenges between balancing the need to give freedom your son while placing appropriate boundaries.

Boy he has a temper.... but it at time justified, there are so many negative influences out there and you can never completely shield from him, in the end, you try within reason to teach him... and trust me that is not easy task.

Watching him grow up year after year, looking back at pictures and video clips, talking about him with close friends is magical, amidst the trying and difficult times, between wanting to provide everything and can only provide somethings, not to mention the curve-balls that lives throws you in the end it is and will always be about him.

I love my nephews and nieces too, I love kids-- Bringing a child up, bringing a son up is an ADVENTURE - Being a parent gives you an insight into a developing mind, it never ceases to amaze me how almost overnight they can learn new skills, tricks and watching them do something for the first time never ceases to amaze me.

Another year go so fast