Friday, March 31, 2006

What Sat means to me?

A month ago, I sat down scrolling my hp phone numbers and looked at the list of names there, I realised I was missing some people especially from my IRC that I had not seen in a long long time. Why? Lots of thing crept up, both in work and business.

I said ok lets meet, from 1 became 2 then 5, soon it became kind of like damm I have not seen some people in a long long time, even Marie for the matter, or Lacy, or Subang lady, or Iwor or Tooth or Subbie, or Madett Gosh I really not seen them in a long long time

I know I been up and down but one should not lose contact with fren coz of all thse things. These Frens are important for me, (not to say other frens are not, dun go there lol) For me it was meeting frens, and it still is. I said to my IRC fren lets meet, lets celebrate something, we have not met in a long time, why not April 1. Even till now some of my frens think its an April Fool joke, why? coz thats the prankster I am. hehehehe

Its a time for frens to meet, its a time for laughter, tears, rekindling the time you shared. Its time for saying Hi!

So Saturday, I am going to walk into that hall, free, single (need I mention available) and having frens that I have not met in a long time, to chat, to hug, to share experience in one room. Why? I think I need that, I am the catalyst for this event, I want to meet my frens? Do they want to met me? I sure hope so? lol

I have pain

Fark!!! I should have seen this coming, too damm thick headed to see the sign. I am popping pills coz I am in pain. Why?? Read below

Calf muscle injuries can happen to runners, walkers and all sorts of ball players, but they are painfully common in racket sports that require a lot of quick starts and stops. If your calf muscles are too tight, they can't take the sudden stress, so they strain, they pop, and end up causing you real grief.

Tight Calf Muscles
(Gastrocnemius and Soleus)

A common problem in athletes is tight calf muscles, especially in runners. The symptoms are a gradual tightening in the calf muscles which can get worse when running or improve while running only to tighten up later.

Why do they tighten up?

  • You might have a compartment syndrome.
  • You might have a bio mechanical problem in your running style and need orthotics. See a sports injury specialist or podiatrist that can do bio mechanical analysis.
  • Your muscles have gradually tightened up over a period of months through poor stretching.
Tiny micro tears in the muscles cause them to go into spasm. When they are in spasm or contracted then blood cannot easily get into them. The muscles have squeezed the blood out like a sponge. If the muscles do not get enough blood then they will not get enough nutrients and so will tighten up to protect themselves and weaken and so on.


Time are changing, I am changing

We all change, we all evolve, after futsal last night ( I pickups a muscular injury) came back resting/sleeping, caught an interesting program (8TV, Kevin Hill).

An interesting episode, why? A kindergarden teacher, exceptional, good reviews as a teacher is sacked coz of her past life, 10 years ago, because of situations, life, problems, running away from home at 16 ( the bad parts of life la) she went into porn to survive, later on in life she stopped, wanted to change, she became a pre school teacher and an excellent one I might add. When her past came to light, parents wanted her off, "the gasped in horror how could such a person with a dark past teach their young children" the school side the parents and she got screwed out of a job.

Right or Wrong? We scream injustice or nod our head in agreement, as yourself if you were in her shoes what would you do? And in the position of the parents what would you do?

We all have skeletons in the closet, I have, I still have, so what? If you change that should be in the past, and those who know of your past should shut the fuck up and move and allow you to move on with the life you trying to build. Not time and time again dangle reminder and pick and analyze every word and action you choose to represent your self.

That is the society we life in, these are the people we meet day to day, what matters is the present? Why? coz your past action, decision made is a direct result of where you are right here and now and the path you wish to move on with.

Would you treat me differently, view me differently if you knew my past? Why should it be? You value me for who I am and what I stand for and what I mean to you right here and now, never judge or use the past against someone. This episode was a stark reminder of that. Similar, would you hire a convicted thief to work in your office? With a record? What if that was for stealing rice at the age of 19? hmmmm

We are human, we make mistakes, some move on some don't, dun punish them for what they did in the past, they already paid the price for it. Let them live. Value them for what they are now.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

ATender, A Wine Dinner, A Birthday & Badminton

Its been a hetic week so far, tenders closing, last night and birthday obligations,

The funny thing about tenders is the technical and commercial end have to be packaged to their requirements and that can be a bloody headache, coupled with a business dinner slotted in between and 4 bottles of wine can get pretty stretched. I can always count on Edward to be a kind and polite host.

Back to the tender, what to do have to deliver, then we deliver lah, and so we did at closing on wed 2pm we have put in a USD 520K per year on a 3+1 year plan and seem to be out of the 6 bidders we are in a strong position. Well done vadai and team. Today belanja KFC whole office for a job well done.

Birthday, another fren turn a year older, in the many years I know this fella we have gone from buddies to having war and big scars from falling out, to being frens and being buddies, as I sat in reflection, I begun to realise I have know this fella over 5 years and that a mighty long time. We all have our shortcoming and the prob we both lash at each other shortcoming, we have grown to adapt to each other and know that we can depend on each other, Pity the fella dun read blogs. I hope to be frens for many years to come. I do realise one thing also, through the years we have our friendship and fight and arguments, the core values of respect and dependability still stood their ground in the gravest of crimes and humiliation. We still came for each other in the hour of need. I guess that why we are what we are. I dun expect other to understand

Happy birthday Fren

I ned ot get back in shape and my health is not getting any better, a fren comments on seeing my pic that I dun look that good. Probably true but I have let my self go in more ways then one over the past 18 months and I am sticking to a plang to get back in shape. Badminton is one of it, I know I am improving but I still not happy with the pace. In a game like this, every week is a lesson in playing. Vadai is game on

Sunday, March 26, 2006

My Sat Part 2

Jnr was on my tail all day and my cyber/irl/chat frens (Alp, Teddy, Vs, Svejjen, Adel, Warrior Princess [WP] and others were in Port Klang I kind of planned to join them for lunch. As Jnr went to shower and changes I took mum out for shopping getting her thing done. Since she wanted to go to PK, I kill 2 birds with one stone dropping her off I swang by their office.

Lo behold!!! 6 flight of steps 2 guys (1 on the way from Kajang), 3 girls trying to move furniture, here I was dressed up but seeing the picture that laid before me I went like (WTF!!!!) No question asked started helping to carry down things..(till mum showed up) waaa that was 3 trips in my finest….aiyo…

I was not invited to help my frens in the office shifting (not saying I should have, its their affairs) but seeing how shorthanded they were it would be below me, not to help. Teddy showed up shortly, dressed to the hilt and wear that for shifting is a no no!! So we had 3 trips up and down, then drop mum off, sort out PK politics and protocol on which idiot should invite which idiot "officially" to jnr sports. Gave fingers to all and picked up Jnr vadai and back to Port Klang,

He enjoyed himself there being a busy body at time with always a “tesco cola” in his hand. Then Jen and Alp showing up from the transition. Jnr hit off with everyone. Few more shuttles up and down the stairs we adjourn for lunch at Sreedhana, Jen loved the rasam, well on a Sun, in PK, thats the place to go. I enjoyed feeding Jnr and he enjoyed the company of my frens. Drop him off, said my good byes came to Jen’s office to offer help on the last leg of shifting.

We hived, humped, bucked and almost every muscle..(well almost!) was used and at time we just laid back to recover before attacking it again. All in all by 6ish we were complete… recuperating muscles aching, mind tired, wishing someone would shower me with a bucket of ice.

It was nice in reflection to help out frens even when they dun ask them, it was the right thing to do, so I did it. These are my frens, some I have physically come to know hardly over a year.

On the lighter side Few point to note and learn from.

- Teddy cant carry things
- Dun give a hammer to a certain lady that grunts
- warrior princess is a grandma
- irish drinks does make some people horny till even to the point of an orgasm
- and light green look kind of interesting on the floor
- bottom-up on ur 1st beer after a hard days work is damm good,
- there is a big difference between Indian Claypot Curry Fish and Chinese Claypot Curry Fish
- wait ah I think

My Weekend

My Saturday

Specifically went back coz jnr had sports, crash back in early and the jing-bang left at 6.30am to go for he. Jnr vadai was at top marks awaking alll of us so eager so excited (hey its the kids 1st sports day)

He has super fun marching, playing the games, they gave medals and all. It was a lovely event withn though
the morning sun was bruning down, got a few nice snap shots.

was a day for kids and jnr vadai enjoyed , played and gave 110% proud of him. The smile was worth it all

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Beauty Real/Fake & Life for Rent (Dido)

There 2 topics probably got more to do with each other then one would imagine

I was watching NTV7 Without A Trace ( missing persons drama) and came across a profounding statement that intrigued me. The episode was an aka "Swan Lake" a "not good looking girl" transformed to a goddess and look for love in her new found outlook all the time an equally square guy pines and loves her but she dun see it.

Her quote in the video clip of her "Swan Lake" episode was "I am a gud girl inside, I am beautiful inside but people don't get to see it because of the way I look on the outside...I wish I can change that"

In life we all go thru this. In in the materialistic world we live in everyday this is a challenge, I told a fren once this, its not the brand on the jeans but the way it fits, sadly she dun hear well enough.

LIfe For Rent (DIDO) is one of the most profound statements that she has ever written. If you think about it, life is what you get out of it, life is what you put in to it. If you rent life then you will never own life. IF it is rented then it becomes a life for someone else to rent. If you are so afraid to do something to the point where you won't even try then that is not living at all, that is renting life, not living life.

"While I am so afraid to fail so I won't even try, well how can I say I'm alive" This means so much, it's the most profound part of the song. You should live your life with no regrets. Don't put off doing something because you MIGHT regret it in the future or because you MIGHT fail at it. That isn't what living life is about. And standing here I am.

Question in this world we live in of botox, face lifts, breast augmentation, facials where do you draw the line between living you life and renting you life. If your body really you

Monday, March 20, 2006

See if you can relate to this

I got this email from lacy today morning and it throughly deserve a space in my blog.

It's something that I would like to share with you all.

Daughter-In-Law: "When I cooked food which are blend, you will grumble that they are tasteless. Now that I have cooked saltier, you co mplained that you can't swallow this at all! What exactly do you want?"

When the son came back, the mother immediately ate the food without a word. She stared at him.

The son took a taste on his mother's food and spitted out immediately. He ranted at his wife," Didn't I told you that my mother cannot take too salty food?!"

The wife shouted,"OK! She's your mum! You cook for her in future!" After saying that, she stormed into their room angrily.

Feeling helpless, the son told the mother,"Mum, don't eat this anymore. I will cook you a bowl of noodles."

The mother said,"Son, you have something to tell me? Don't keep everything to yourself."

Son:"Mum, I am going to get promoted soon and my upcoming working schedule will be very, very tight...and as for my wife...ummm...she said she will be going out to work...."

The mother understood what he meant and said in a begging manner,"Son,please don't send me to the Old Folks' Home.."

The son remained silent and tried to think of a good reason to persuade her mother.

Then he said," There is nothing wrong with the Old Folks' Home. Once my wife had went out to work, no one will serve you as well as the Home which provides you meals and care. It would definitely much better than being at home."

The son went for a bath after that and went into the Study Room. He looked out from the windows and thought back and hesitated a while....

His mother has been remaining as a widow since she was young with him,and brought him up painstakingly, solely.

She tried all means to earn as much as she could, in order to support him in studying overseas. Yet she expected nothing nor used her past
painful experience to threaten his son to be filial.

While now, his wife is threatening him with the stake of their marriage.

"Should I send my Mum to the Home?" He asked himself.

"The only person who will accompany you till the end of your life would be your wife.." said a friend before.

"Your mother is in old age now, and if she's lucky,she might be able to live for a few more years longer. Why not be filial to her for this period of time? reminded by some relatives.

He was stuck in a dilemma. He did not want to think anymore, in order not to affect his decision.

The son found a Home with high standards, built on a beautiful and transquil mountain top. He told himself that he would feel much better when the more he spent.

When the son helped his mother into the lobby of the Home, the 42" TV was turned on. The programme shown on screen was a comedy. But no one was laughing.

A few old folks, dressed similarly in clothing, were sitting there, in a daze. There was one who was sitting improperly on a sofa, there was one who was bending down to pick up a piece of biscuit from the floor, there was one who was talking to himself...

The son knew that his mother likes sunlight, so he chose a room with ample sun rays shining into the room. By viewing out from the room, was a big piece of greenery scene. Few nurses were wheeling some old folks out for some fresh air.

It was so pathetic of silence in the background. The sun would still need to set down.

Soon it was dusk.

The son told the mother,"Mum, I am leaving."

The mother waved to him to say goodbye, opening her toothless mouth..

He turned back to look at his mother. She was full of grey hair and wrinkled skin with deep set eyes...

He found that she was really old.

He remembered when he was six, due to some circumstances, his mother cannot bring him along with her thus temporarily placed him at a relative's home for few days. He recalled hugging his mother's thigh and begged her not to leave him alone. In the end, his mother never leave him alone and decide to stay with him.

He stopped thinking and left.

When he returned home, his wife and his mother-in-law were busy discarding things from his mother's room, happily.

One of the discarded item was his tall trophy which he won as First Prize when he was young. He wrote an essay on "MY MOTHER".

The second item discarded was a dictionary. That was the first gift from his mother, who scrimped and saved for a month in order to buy for him.

He shouted,"Enough! Stop discarding anymore!"

His mother-in-law cried," There were so much rubbish. If don't discard, there would not be any place for my stuff.."

His wife continued,"Yeah! Need to dump away that old, stinky bed of your mum too. We will buy a new bed for my mum later,"

He saw some pictures from the stack..they were taken at a zoo and amusement park when his mother brought him there.

"These are precious belongings of my Mum! You can't discard them!"

"What sort of attitude is this? I demand you to apologise to my Mum NOW!" ranted the wife.

The husband said," When I got married with you, that showed that I will love your Mum too. But why can't you do the same too?"

He went back to the Home and saw his mother weeping in between her frail legs. She was missing the moments when her son would apply ointment for her every night...

The son kneeled before her and said,"Mum, here I come. I brought the ointment too."

The mother said," I will apply it myself, Son! You still need to work tomorrow. Go home, Son!"

Son said,"Mum, please forgive me! Let's go home!"

Hope this is inspirational and touching to you.
Without our parents, we won't be here.
No parents will resort to harm their own children.
They only want the benefits for them.

For Daughters & Sons: Please remember to return gratitude to your dads and mums.

For Daughter-In-Laws & Sons-In-Laws: Please love your in laws as you
did to your parents, coz without them, you will not find your
partners...they are parents too..

Sunday, March 19, 2006

NST : The Sunday Column: Beg, borrow or steal, life’s too precious Part 2

My email to Kalimullah Hassan of NST

Dear Sir,
As with every Sunday, I look forward to reading you article, and this week was rewarding and frustrating but I have to admit this is reality.
Sir, This is the reality average human being like us have to face, being exploited from every angle and no proper forum to address and miles of red tape. In reality these are facts we all have to face time after time, day after day. Firstly I happy your brother survived, but if all the steps taken by you and your wife had not materialized what then?
Prove me wrong by saying the Insurance companies that provide medical insurance are actually providing them, we are exploited. Life is not a gamble insurance companies can play with and we ordinary Malaysians we are powerless to stop them, after all who are we to stop them.
Medical centers sprouting here and there make double and triple profits at the ordinary Malaysian expense. Your experience came to light because you have the avenue to express them through your pen. How about the rest?
There MUST be regulation to put life about money, to compel, bond, or regulate all such medical centers private especially, that they must stabilize the patient then talk about money not act only on payment. What is the ringgit value placed to decide a human's life? A Malaysian Life
Such a scenario of life versus money the movie John Q come to mind. That's a movie... this is reality you will get happy endings and sad endings. Do you really think we can change it?

NST : The Sunday Column: Beg, borrow or steal, life’s too precious Part 1

Reality of Medical Practise - Extract form NST Column

The Sunday Column: Beg, borrow or steal, life’s too precious

Kalimullah Hassan

March 19:
I ALMOST lost my younger brother this week because he did not have much money on him, because he had too much pride in him.

It was late Tuesday when my sister-in-law called from a clinic in Klang, saying my brother had suffered a heart attack while playing badminton.

At first, I thought it was just chest pain. After all, he had turned 42 and when I saw him a week earlier, he had looked fine.

Nevertheless, I told her not to take chances and rush him to the nearest hospital.

"The General Hospital?" she said. "Is that the nearest?" No, there was a private hospital nearby. Rush him there, I said.

Then my brother came on the line, gasping, asking which hospital he should be taken to. The nearest hospital, for God’s sake, and if it is the private hospital, then go there.

Suddenly, it struck me that what this proud family could not tell me was that they did not have money to pay the deposit in a private hospital.

My brother operates a canteen in a school in Klang. He makes enough to make ends meet and keep his wife and four children comfortable.

But he has always had this proud streak where he would not ask for help, even though he needed it desperately.

I told him not to worry, just go to the nearest hospital, and I would be there soon to look into the deposit.

At the hospital, my sister-in-law had paid RM700 — all the money she carried — as part payment for the RM5,000 deposit.

They do not believe in credit cards and probably, with the uncertainty in their incomes, they would not qualify for it either.

As I paid the deposit with my credit card, I wondered what would happen to people who did not have a brother or someone else to turn to in an emergency like this.

In the following days, this question became more relevant and pressing to me.

He did have a heart attack, a bad one at that. The following day, the hospital performed angioplasty and inserted stents to keep the artery clear.

In the morning, the hospital’s accounts department called, asking for another RM3,000 deposit, which my wife paid.

And the day after his procedure, the accounts department called my wife again — she had instructed them not to bother my brother with money issues — asking her to pay another RM24,000.

She told them she’d do it by evening as she was tied up during the day; but they kept calling, saying the accounts department closed at 5pm and she had to come earlier.

So, she dropped everything and went to the hospital and paid the money. Wow. Is that how they run hospitals these days? Apparently so.

We have read in the newspapers so many times how patients died because they were refused treatment when they could not come up with the deposit.

That was probably on my brother’s mind when he, on one hand wanting to ensure he received good treatment and, on the other, knowing he had not enough money, hesitated rushing to the private hospital.

He could have gone to the General Hospital, which was a distance away, and received almost free treatment. But then again, he was afraid he would not make it.

In some ways, I am glad I have become familiar with the unsaid word, which is so important in our society.

People do not tell you what is on their mind and beat around the bush, expecting you to get the message.

Being blunt is not the done thing; asking for help is a sign of inferiority. Hogwash.

But I suppose I cannot blame my brother because this is the way we have been brought up.

It would have made it easier for me had they just told me that they wanted to go to the nearest hospital, which was a private hospital, but did not have the money for the deposit. Precious minutes were wasted until it dawned on me what they were really trying to say.

The lesson from this episode is that when you do not have enough money, it can kill you. When you have too much pride, it can kill you as well.

The cardiologist at the hospital was superb; a young man with an excellent bedside manner who was very comforting to the family.

He took time to explain to my sister-in-law and her children what had happened and what would happen and what the risks were. He left them more assured than when they were uninformed.

To the surgeons and doctors, saving a life was the most important thing to them. But to the administrators, entrusted by the owners and investors, the bottom line was equally important.

So, as they are trained, they harass the patient and his family, asking for top-ups, and subtly letting it be known that treatment could come to a halt if the monies are not paid on time.

Years ago — in 1989 — my mother had a heart attack. She was 56. So it runs in the family.

I was out of a job, my wife was a junior lawyer and University Hospital informed us that they needed to do a by-pass. They recommended a nearby private hospital.

Then, it cost about RM18,000 to do a by-pass and between my wife and me, we had only a fraction of that money and we asked the doctors how much time we had.

"You have to do it within the next 12 months. She will be fine until then with medication," was the reply.

We figured that beg, borrow or steal, we would raise the money within the year and send her for the surgery.

But three months later, she had another major attack and was rushed to the University Hospital. She was dead on arrival.

I have never forgiven myself for that and till today, my wife and I wonder how different it would have been if we had had money then. But being Muslims, we also believe it was fated and going forward, we should do what we can to help others who may not be as fortunate.

We can only count our blessings that we could be there for my younger brother, but the question that bugs us is, what about others like him? Do they have someone to call and ask for help? Do they have someone who can help if they cannot get to a government hospital?

It is just like beautiful little three-year-old Angel Lai in Sabah who was saved by stem-cell therapy only because her relatives pooled their resources to raise the RM100,000 for her treatment.

The joy her family feels does not justify or warrant the question: What if not...

But what if they could not raise that money? Like my wife and I couldn’t in 1989.

Do we sigh and say life’s a bitch and get on with our lives? Again, do we say it is not our responsibility?

We cannot keep saying that. Our society is our responsibility. The Government can only do so much. It could do much more if there was greater competency and efficiency all round.

We can only hope that the Abdullah Ahmad Badawi administration succeeds in changing the mindset, in building up the software to match the hardware that is in place.

But even when that happens, the better off in society cannot afford to fold their arms and do nothing about the less fortunate.

Is there a solution? I don’t know. But if we spend less time bickering, plotting, undermining — whether in politics, business or life — and diverted our energy into activities to help the less fortunate, like in the developed societies, we can only become a better country.

But heck, what’s the point? The good guys will continue to be the good guys, and those who are not good, words are not going to change them.

Yes. Life’s a bitch.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Formula 1 - Gala Dinner, Entertainment Shows

I am not usually critic of the Governments or Corporation and the decisions they make that affect directly and indirectly in our lives. Something is out of whack when we are trying to be prudent, practical and all the corporate words to project they are doing a good thing for the image or the country and putting Malaysia on the international map.


Formula 1 Grand Prix, F1 Gala Dinner and the icon on the entertainment is Lionel Richie, almost all the events. Just some gibber on "Lionel Richie a superb American R&B singer, songwriter, composer, and occasional actor. A class act no doubt. One of the world's most recognized and rewarded performers. He's sold nearly 100 million albums and notched 22 Top 10 hits--13 of them during a jaw-dropping swing between 1981-87. Five Grammy Awards, an Oscar and a Golden Globe--not to mention piles of American Music Awards and People's Choice Awards--grace his shelves. Only Richie and Irving Berlin have scored No. 1 hits in nine consecutive years.”

What’s wrong with this pic? May be its just me, but I believe instead of calling foreign starts to come and perform, bring out our own stars from our backyards, the Sitis’ , the M.Nasirs’, the Ramli Sarips, the Too Phats’, the Resh Monu’s, or even Poetic Ammo you want blue bring Alleycats, tio, I mean we have countless number of talents, it we do not showcase them in an arena where is broadcast to the whole F1 world

All the hype bout singing English songs and language they can understand is garbage. I take a bet if you go to Sweden you get Swedish performers as acts, same as in Germany or in anywhere in Europe or any other continent

Come on, to me its out of whack, my gripe, we are the host, our F1, our platform, our performance and our $$$$$

The week so far / Point Proven

Let see its 3am for starters

Gifts I got for my birthday, a watch from an old fren, a card from an old fren, a watch from the family, L made a nice keychain for me, a cake in the office and a card at the office. Nice.

Work on Tender, then another tender, got wet in the rain for Edward, drank beer with Edwards, he of course forgot my birthday then started to make silly excuses for it, a pint down then it was off with Teddy.

Being tech savvy is good and bad and it put in an enviable position or crunching formulars and number and until 2pm today, it was chaotic till I drew a frigging line, everyone shut the fuck the report the way it is dun ask me to translate in everybody's personal flavor!!!!! Done

Went for badminton today, had a pretty good game, fitness still down, sparring with Teddy outside the court working on my backhands...... on of the few times I get to be in my zone.

In the court a slow pace game not many smashes, I am a stroke player and like to have in the matches, I play with the guys (doubles) and I know I can be above their level but I stroke play with them rarely smashing , shuttle positioning, I try to fine tune my game.

While fine tuning my game Teddy, who is supposed to be my partner goes for the same shuttle and swinging and I like to ass this word, swinging blindly as he frame connects to me 4th and 5th fingers. (fucking ouch). Let me say this double fucking ouch... from the second I head the crunching sound, I walked away, not to alarm anyone but I feared fracture the worst, thank god no.

2 option stop playing and cry in pain like a baby, or fight the pain (be the man) and carry on since no fracture but a whole lot of blue black.

Spar with Jen on the court then joined the big guys to play, not this is the next level, I was tighten up but what the heck it was my 1st session with them, I froze up a few times and cautious to play my shots, so end up making mistakes losing badly at one point but we picked out home and caught up. Even though we lost , I enjoyed it, inside I know I can make it at this level. Just need more opportunities.

Got back watch Xfiles the movie, crash into bed. Some people dun understand the following terms and signs

- good night really means good night
- closed door means leave me alone
- locked door means " m naked and leave me alone"
- using the word END in an SMS means you dun want to discuss
- no entry means no entry ( no discussion)
- silent treatment means just that
- No means no


Hit the bed

woke up 3am did my blog chatted with commander, penyapu and emily not its 3.55am time to sleep

This to tackle next week

- Board Meeting
- Deliverence on Circus and MOU
- Getting a date
- Meeting with MSC
- jnr Vadai sport day

Monday, March 13, 2006

Polls!! Polls and more Polls

With all the garbage polls available in the country today I think the most truthful poll and realistic poll it this one from TV SMITH's DUA SEN

Go Vote!!!

A year older and one day

Something to make you smile before I get back into the grind of things

Mute Language
A woman gets on a city bus. She looks at the driver and holds up one hand; the driver holds up two hands. Next, the woman points up; the driver points down. Then, the woman grabs her breast; the driver grabs his crotch.Finally, the woman grabs her butt and gets off the bus.

A curious passenger asked the bus driver what the odd motions were all about.The driver explained, "The woman is a deaf-mute. She asked me if a bus ride is five cents, and I told her it was ten cents. Next, she asked if the bus was going uptown, and I told her it was going downtown. Then, she asked if the bus was going past the dairy, and I told her it was going past the ballpark."

The passenger interjected, "Okay, but why did she grab her butt as she left the bus?"The driver continued, "She replied, 'Oh shit, I'm on the wrong bus!'"

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Older Today

I wanted to write something as I turned older today then I received this email on my birthday and crack me up......

"How To Know You're Growing Older"

  • Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work.
  • The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals.
  • You feel like the morning after, and you haven't been anywhere.
  • Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D.
  • You get winded playing chess.
  • Your children begin to look middle aged.
  • You finally reach the top of the ladder, and find it leaning against the wrong wall.
  • You join a health club and don't go.
  • You decide to procrastinate but then never get around to it.
  • Your mind makes contracts your body can't meet.
  • You need glasses... to find your teeth.
  • A dripping faucet causes an uncontrollable bladder urge.
  • You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions.
  • You look forward to a dull evening.
  • You walk with your head held high trying to get use to your bifocals.
  • Your favorite part of the newspaper is "25 Years Ago Today."
  • You turn out the light for economic rather than romantic reasons.
  • You sit in a rocking chair and can't make it go.
hahahahahaha ROTFLMAO I aint there yet gorgeous!!!! but thanks for the email

Saturday, March 11, 2006

3R & Game on Part 2

I turn a year older tomorrow.... my reflection are best said thru this song. Like an old record player I have kept harping on themes like moving forward, time to move on, time to let go of the past and time for the past to let go of me.....

This is succh a great song. I think of my old friends from hockey, rotaract, kuantan, singapore, and school. I miss those days. When you could play with your friends and not worry about life. All you were worried about is if you would be able to play the next night. Brings back some good memories, in the same breath makes me a little teary-eyed, know that we are getting older and knowing the past is the past and our lives must move forward.

Anyway, for me this song is simply about GROWING UP and MOVING ON. It's about remembering your childhood and youth and cherishing those memories, but also knowing that it is the past and it's time to say goodbye.

The singer bitter sweetly reminisces about the places he used to go and the life he used to live, back when he was a young man/boy. But he also realizes that things have changed and while he will never FORGET, he accepts that these things have become MEMORIES. He has grown up, he has moved on, he's living a different life now. I think it's an amazing song, because he tells you to treasure your memories, the moments of your childhood and youth and make them a part of the 'you' you are today. While you have to accept the past as the past, it doesn't mean you have to move on without it. Letting go without forgetting, moving on without loosing touch. In the end it is goodbye, the singer is off to greater things now, but he will alway carry these feelings and memories in his heart.

Think that sums it up perfectly. It's hard to say goodbye, but after a while, you just have to. It's time to let things go; not forget them, but let them go and move on.

Nickelback - Photograph

Look at this photograph, Every time I do it makes me laugh.
How did our eyes get so red, and what the hell is on Joey's head?
This is where I grew up, I think the present owner fixed it up.

I never knew we ever went without, the second floor is hard for sneaking out.

This is where I went to school, most of the time had better things to do.
Criminal record says I broke in twice, I must've done it half a dozen times.
Wonder if it's too late, should I go back and try to graduate?
Life's better now than it was back then, if I was them I wouldn't let me in.

Every memory of looking out the back door,
I have the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor.
It's hard to say it, Time to say it, Goodbye, goodbye.
Every memory of walking out the front door,
I found the photo of the friend I was looking for,
It's hard to say it, Time to say it, Goodbye, goodbye.

Remember the old arcade, blew every dollar that we ever made.
The cops hated us hanging out They said someone went and burned it down.
We used to listen to the radio and sing along with every song we know.
We said someday we'd find out how it feels to sing with more than just a steering wheel.

Kim's the first girl I kissed, I was so nervous that I nearly missed.
She's had a couple kids since then, I haven't seen her since God knows when.

Every memory of looking out the back door,
I have the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor.
It's hard to say it, Time to say it, Goodbye, goodbye.
Every memory of walking out the front door,
I found the photo of the friend I was looking for.
It's hard to say it, Time to say it, Goodbye, goodbye.

I miss that town, I miss the faces. Can't care to erase, Can't care to replace it.
I miss it now, I can't believe it, So hard to stay, too hard to leave it.
I could relive those days I know the one thing that would never change.

Every memory of looking out the back door,
I have the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor.
It's hard to say it, Time to say it, Goodbye, goodbye.
Every memory of walking out the front door,
I found the photo of the friend I was looking for.
It's hard to say it, Time to say it, Goodbye, goodbye.

Look at this photograph,Every time I do it makes me laugh.
Every time I do it makes me...

To my dear frens you know who you are... I have but a smile and a warm heart for you.

My best photography 2005-2006 that come to mind with this song. Cholea(Surjit), Karam(TV3), Terry (MHF) . Sunday, Nov 20, 2005.

Friday, March 10, 2006

3R & Game on

it nice being away sometimes...either for work, or holiday or just being away....after a long time... I had such an opportunity to go away..this time to Kerteh.. had a few nights to my self... on a cowboy town such as this you can reflect, review and re-evaluate and I did just that, weather its walk on Kijal Beaches or sipping beet as I watch "the hill on fire" (burning gas emission towers) in Kerteh again the back drop of a clear sky.... it gave me what I needed and what I need was an overview coupled with the fact that my age was going up another number.

I am happy where I am, I know what I need to focus and what I need to change…my priorities are still the same. My goals the same. Now that I head back to KL, I feel not lost but convinced and realistic of what I want to do. There I times I have to make unpopular choices with my friends….and being my friends its not easy to them to accept by they respect it.

I got a few new players in mind games, some physically, some via the blog….its sometimes like playing poker…..dun show ur hands.

So I’m back…GAME ON. hehehe

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Kerteh & The Oscars

Well its a cold night in Kerteh.... its pretty quiet from the hustle and bustle of the city. A quick few drinks with some lovely clients it was back to the room to work on presentations.... and catch the repeat of the Oscars...I love the Oscars for the touching acceptance speeches, the recognition of the people who passed on, and some noteble moments like this....

To the dog Pound - "Its Hot Out Here For a Pimp" (from Hustle & Flow) was rocking. "Pimps are legitimate now?" Maybe Jon Stewart was right when he mentioned on the show that "Pimps are like agents. Only they have better hats."

To the Best Picture (Go watch it) - "Crash," which covers a 36-hour period in Los Angeles as the lives of people of many races collide in a way that highlights bigotry

And an actor that I admire said it best " We are a little bit out-of-touch in Hollywood," George Clooney said. "I think that's probably a good thing. We are the ones who talked about AIDS when it was only being whispered ... We talked about civil rights ... I'm proud to be part of this Academy, proud to be part of this community."

I still love my last blog!!!!!

Saturday, March 04, 2006

How are you? ... really ??? Hu-Ha

Being realistic...People asking me how I am, really. I mean mostly people just say, "How are you?" and social skills training has taught me over the years that they are pretty much only emotionally prepared to hear the response, "Fine."

Yesterday evening my cousin called me up to ask if I had been feeling sad all day. I was taken aback and surprised with her question. "Why do you ask?" She had read through the language of my e-mail and MSN replies to her during the day and thought that perhaps something was not right with me. We chatted for a while bout our lives and when I hung up the phone I realized I has a darling cousin who is grateful caring enough to find out without jumping the gun.

Ironically I had just written a blog earlier bout asking frens not to make assumption on what was going in my life then immediately start offering solutions. If she would have called up and said, "So how are you?" I most probably would have replied, "Oh, just fine, thanks, and you?" Instead, I was able to tell her that I was sad because of a confidential family matter, thoughts that perhaps the disease was still niggling at me, anxiety about the job, and frustration that sometimes are not turning out the way they should, frens and enemies are not what they seem and one and on and on .....

She listened. She is so good at that. I also realised I been listening so long to other helping them out, I never had the chance to speak and help my self out!!! I asked T this morning what she thought if a fren contacting her after a long time with an e-mail sounding: “So how are you really?” T's reply was to blink!!! Mental Note : I have not sent any email like that out yet lol

For me, I would love it (and do) if a friend would add "really" to the asking of how I am. You see, I don't believe anyone (not all la take it easy) is at all interested in me (my purview and I have my reasons). I aint a sint either, I have my flaws and preferences. My cousin knows this about me. Once when I stayed overnight with her and her family she came to me when I was sitting in the swing saying "I juz wish you dun try and make yourself invisible like this. Come out and be join us."

I have come out but I still choose who I should tell, what, because I have stopped being an open book, why should I?

"I would feel warm and safe inside, overwhelmed with gratitude that they took the trouble and time to notice me and care enough to want to know, I would smile wide and deep, and tell them all they wanted to know about me." A lovely qoute. That my cousin


The beauty bout roadshow it the need to lugg hotel to hotel long days and nights and a different bed every night. That actually the beauty. The nightmare is when it is poorly organized and lack of support, then it become a one man show.

As the team in my office becomes stronger and bigger each person being brought for their skills, I can help but notice that I am still the point man, on the eve of roll-out my new collegues mum get a heart attack, the principal has to go to Singapore but the show must go on.

Trumpets blowing!!!!!!!!

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Has it been that long


it be a week since I poured my random thoughts. Not for the sake of lazyness but cought up in a road show came to a head withe choices being made... frens each haveing to make their own choice on where they stand.... attitude...well its WTF preception.... yeah I helpoed a few frens but life goes on...

Oh yeah I am battling with a know what...this time I got nothing to gain...nothing to lose


forward march