Monday, July 31, 2006

Tables turned around

Before I get label a male chuvanist hahaha ya right!! This is a superb piece sent to me by Mr.Scud



Just a thought?

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits.

She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.

Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled "WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.

Thanks

10 comments:

marie said...

hahah thats a good one...heheh.

Nishanti said...

Scud has a gf ah? there goes my chance of blowing him. Cheh how wasted!! I means I would have given my boyfriend the hell of a ride and then give him a hell of his life by paying the credit cards :p hehehehehehe . I know I'm a weird woman!

cyber-red said...

lol funny!

Angie said...

This is definitely not written by Mr.Scud because I read it before. Someone sent it to me thru email.

Anyway... I always have no objection in the bed activities. la la la...

darthvadai said...

dey aunti i say sent to me not he tulis....aunty mean aunty laaaa

darthvadai said...

why nishanti u want a piece of scud ah? how u know scud?

~*~LostSoul~*~ said...

lalalalala

Nishanti said...

I don't know him.But at the peak i'm at, i'd blow anyone who's single :p

Astalavista!

Mr Scud said...

the Scud speaks.......
why wud nishanti blow a single guy off la? there's this superb malay saying tat goes, 'siapa makan cili, dia rasa pedas'......cheers fr the Scud

Anonymous said...

I just landed here coz I googled vadai. damn funny though. but where can I find my vadai please?